Tuesday, November 23, 2010

Fat, Frumpy Days



It is definitely a fat, frumpy day. It may be the downright depressing Montana weather. (Think blizzards, snow drifts, chapped face from the weather) I really didn't even want to leave the house today. My darling boyfriend was sweet enough to drive me to school though, so no excuse to skip. (Besides today being a fat, frumpy day.) I put on a men's Abercrombie button up, an oversized grey Holister sweater over top and two bright belts to give myself a slightly feminine shape. Add some turquoise and va va voom. Well... it wasn't a velour track suit.
As the day wore on, two boring classes down and no sign of cheery weather, I began to make peace with my fat, frumpy day. (If I'm being honest, the enormous burrito from Taco Del Sol didn't necessarily help... but watching the movie Goonies definitely improved my mood and absolved my guilt:)
So here's a toast to the impending, bleak Montana winter and more fat, frumpy days that I'll inevitably have to make peace with and the absolute blessing of little brothers who give me their too small button up shirts.
Xo.
-h.

Wednesday, July 28, 2010

Hairnet Wednesday...





As you can see from the first two photos, I started the day with an adorable little number. High-waisted wool black skirt (hand me down from mom:) with a fun graphic tee (Pac Sun), a chunky plastic bracelet (boutique in the Dominican Republic), and a great silver knotted necklace (Dominican Republic, too, I believe). I ran some errands around town and even got a compliment from the woman who renewed my car title at the courthouse. I was most pleased that she liked my outfit because every DMV or other government employee who takes my money to make my car legally acceptable for road use seems to hate life so much they can't be bothered to return a friendly smile or light chit chat. And this woman seemed like no exception until she gave me the once over. It must have been the guns and diamonds juxtaposition on my shirt.

Feeling like a million bucks I headed to work at noon. I changed into my green polo shirt, (much like those the Arby's employees wear)oversize green pants and practical Dansko shoes. The outfit is so depressing I decided to add a hairnet today. After all, if I'm going to make food for 80 people and serve it out of industrial steam tables I may as well play along with the entire lunch lady look. After work I got home in time to hang out with my two-and-a-half year old niece for a few minutes. She asked what my hairnet was. I explained it and asked if perhaps she'd like to try it on. I said, "Violet, would you like to wear my hairnet? Look how cool it is!" She stared at me with a deadpan expression and responded: "That's not cool." Amen buddy. Amen. Guess I can't wear diamonds all day long...

Tuesday, July 27, 2010

Thank the Lord for Sensible, Comfortable, Working Woman’s shoes…

Today, I am the concierge at the assisted living facility where I work. I say today because I wear a few different, less glamorous hats during the week. On Wednesday and Thursday I am the evening cook. I spend eight hours washing dishes, making magic on the smoldering griddle, whisking soups to an edible state and steaming frozen vegetables. By the end of each cook shift my bangs are plastered to my forehead, my pants are spackled with the main entrée and my apron is sagging with grease, suds and indefinable food particles. Like I said, not so glamorous.

But today, as the concierge, I got to wear an adorable outfit with every intention of sitting in an office, answering the phone and never having to pull on latex gloves to bus the dining room or step in to the walk in freezer with my practical (but oh-so unfortunate looking) Danskos.

When I arrived at work, ten minutes before breakfast was served, I heard worried murmurs: “the cook never showed up,” “Who’s gonna make breakfast?”

Remain calm, I told myself, no need to soil my beaded butterfly skirt and crocket racer back tank. I walked into the kitchen to find the two servers and prep-cook nervously staring at the menu for the day. Indeed, the cook was nowhere to be seen and no one knew what to do.

I quickly fasted a frightening clown apron, made by a crafty co-worker who also milks her horses to make pancakes, and settled into the frenetic pace of a kitchen running behind schedule.

I stirred Malt-o-meal, thawed and baked sausage patties and sent the servers out with carts of bananas and applesauce. While I was preparing an egg, cinnamon, and milk mixture for French toast, my boss showed up and finished breakfast.

As I retreated to my office I realized how important a competent attitude and comfortable pair of heels are. My Sofft patent black heels were outstanding under pressure. I actually made it through a long seven-hour day with out so much as unfastening the three-inch wedges for a mini foot massage. Time for a new pair of Soffts and some new co-workers☺

Ladies, if I can survive 80 hungry elders in heels, you can survive a day in great heels at your job! What are your favorite comfy, gorgeous shoes?
Xo
-h.

Friday, July 23, 2010

Hey, it's OK!


So, I decided that I need to be more consistent with my blogging. That said, I stared at my computer screen- all that endless white space-- and couldn't think of anything interesting, delightful or meaningful to write. I opened my Glamour magazine and told myself I'd write about whatever page I turned to. Page number 122 in the August 2010 issue of Glamour is the Hey, it's OK! page. There is a little cartoon girl perkily standing with hand on hip and then a few validations for the modern woman in the form of "Hey, it's OK! ...to paint only your first two nails when you wear peep-toe shoes." Instead of simply reiterating those validations, I thought I'd compose a few of my own and hope you add yours as well.
Hannah's Hey, it's OK's:
Hey, it's OK! ...not to know if Ok, Okay, OK, ok, or O.K. is the correct AP style for the stupid word, even after an entire semester spent poring over the AP style book.

...to think blogging on a Friday night is actually more spectacular than getting glammed up for a night on the town.

...to browse your cousin's ex best friend's boyfriend's sister's facebook albums for a ridiculous amount of time before realizing it's ridiculous to be browsing your cousin's ex best friend's sister's facebook album.

...to be following Heidi Montag on twitter. Somebody has to keep tabs on the crazies.

...to feel extremely accomplished for making it through work while hung over.

...to be angry that your ex got over you and is now getting married.

...to just be you- enduring quirks that may not be that enduring and all.

Thursday, July 22, 2010

The Great Outdoors


In a far far away land (we're talking no electricity and no neighbors for miles-except maybe the creepy backwoodsman who lives off the land, abducts his wives and has no idea that his lumberjack apparel went in and out of vogue) called Snedeker Basin I stayed in a "rustic" little cabin for two days. By rustic I mean four bunk beds, two queen sized beds in two rooms, a stove and little table for sorting out deer parts and playing cards while drinking whiskey sort of outpost. The hunting cabin looks like it was dropped by a crane in the middle of the Snedeker Basin hilltop with no visible roads to connect it to anything but the 6,500 foot hills around it.
My cabin-ing companion, Fred, says the Blackfeet Indians hunted the hills for thousands of years, monitoring the migration of buffalo by burning the grass in certain patterns. Thinking about chasing buffalo, antelope, elk, deer in the bitter Montana winters to survive affirms my staunch belief that God knew exactly what he was doing when he plunked me down on earth in 1986. I would be the whiniest Indian in the tribe- eventually getting exiled to an enemy tribe (who hopefully can gather berries in a warmer state:)
Now, it's not that I don't enjoy the great outdoors, especially growing up in the treasure state. But with allergies that flare up when I even think about animals, agriculture, flowers, penicillin and socks with sandals, my joy is diminished. Then there's my irrational fear that I'll get out of cell service, in, say, almost anywhere in Montana, have a reaction to basically any flora from the car to the cabin door and die. While I've lived a good 23 years, I'm not ready to die before I find somewhere to don my light denim shirt and polka dot skirt.
So, with trepidation I approached my stay at Snedeker Basin. But...turns out, it was incredible! I saw hillsides covered in lavender, mullan, snaking creeks, grazing cows, singing sparrows. On the second night at sunset I approached a herd of 200 elk and sat 50 yards from them, silently trying to communicate just hold blessed I felt to sit in their presence. The barking of an elk is something I've never heard, the stampeding of antelope traveling 35 m.p.h. is something graceful and breathtaking. And while I itched my eyes, cursed my constricted lungs and contemplated reading my Glamour magazine in the car with the a/c cranking, I paused long enough to see the extraordinary setting enveloping me.
I am so proud to be a Montanan-- even in allergy season.

Monday, April 26, 2010

These are a few of my favorite things...

Feel free to add to this list but my current fashion favorites are:
Floral print dresses with leather jackets (back to that theme of great juxtapositions)
Structured velvet jackets and bustiers with a hint of silk or lace
90's denim button up shirts making a resurgence (and taking the place of lumber jack shirts, thank the Lord!)
Sequins that are still on our radar, but in healthy doses. My favorite is Lauren Conrad's look on the cover of Glamour: destroyed daisy dukes with a silver sequin tee.
Short cotton skirts with pointless, (but adorable!) colorful zippers
The Giorgio Armani fall line as showcased at fashion week. The bright orange, reds and pinks are delectable as the silk dresses that look like flower petals...sigh. Oh, and did I mention the green velvet is sheer opulence. Oh Giorgio... (http://www.nytimes.com/packages/html/style/fashionweek/runway.html#/fall_2010_armani_giorgio/slide_show)
When DVF sticks to flirty, patterned dresses (ugh, pants and tee's that were incorporated in the spring line, you were way out of your element Diane-y)
Cornflower blue, so sexy. (Weeeeeelllll done on this one Versace)


Dislikes:
Christopher Kane's spring line of table cloths. Seriously, I just wretched. Admittedly, I'm not too familiar with Christopher, but when you make a spring line that is mostly nursery colored table cloth skirts and tops you deserve a "hell no, we won't wear." (backhand for a terrible transformation of the out of date lumberjack shirt I have in my closet...)
Pants that combine leather and denim- backhand Versace for trying to combine dominatrix and 70's flared jeans.

Alright, that's all I've got for now. After looking at all those malnourished models I'm gonna go eat some cookies in their honer.
Go get your trend on.
Xx Hannah

Thursday, April 22, 2010

The Fabric of Life

WHY FASHION?


Let's return to Naeem Inayatullah, months after my last post.

“While writing is certainly a skill that requires a certain mastery of technique, I see it also as an engagement with the very fabric of life.

I've realized that writing about fashion, clothing trends, seasonal do's and don'ts isn't hard hitting journalism. But it is my connection to writing- my way of connecting literal fabric to the fabric of my life and passion for writing.

Without further ado...
Thought for today: fashion juxtaposition
Nautical and urban grunge. Let's begin with nautical. I'm thinking stripes, red, gold and navy blue. Crisp, collared, cape cod. Urban grunge: leather, faded jeans with trendy tears and splatters, jewelry that isn't particularly attractive. Now let's juxtapose. A Harley riding bad boy, our urban grunge boy takes a trek to cape cod to pick up his lady friend. She's got on her white capris, red polo shirt and an oversized yellow and gold patent Michael Kors tote. The two cruise the coast and one thing leads to another... and we've got a hybrid fashion baby. The look: destroyed dark jeans, form fitting, girly nautical tee, high leather shoes with straps that serve no purpose, sleek ponytail, pearl earrings and lots of chunky turquoise jewelry.
That was juxtaposition number uno.
Next I think we'll discuss the mis-matching patterns trend that has invaded the glossy pages of Vogue. Or velvet's rise to stardom...
Xo. for now- go get your own trend on